Wednesday, May 23, 2012

some past thoughts of'before the real pregnancy'

Yeah…finally I have missed ‘it’.

Though I have not done the self test but I am almost sure.

The feeling of euphoria has not yet struck, (that will come after the confirmation), but since I have missed the due date, I am feeling alarmed, afraid and petrified.

And the problem is, this time I can not blame anyone….. for those anticipations, at least.

For the first time, when we were evading the ultimate next step, after being married for one and a half year almost, every other person, if that happened to be a woman and a mother, would never loose the opportunity to tell or signal me that how wonderful it is to have a kid, that being a mother is the most blissful thing in the world, that its smiles never fail to cheer up your gloomy day, that when it hugs you or calls you mummy- those are the most joyous moments of your life, etc., etc, etc….

True!! All true!!

I agree.

But the problem is no one told me that the process of becoming a mother is not that joyful.

First, the whole nine months were like a physical and emotional swing for me. One moment I would feel like jumping stairs and the other I would feel so tired and drained of energy that going to the kitchen to have something to eat would seem like an uphill task.

Second, ‘to have something to eat’ too was not an easy thing to get. I would crave for things whose name I could barely remember and the descriptions like ‘it is made of curd, khatta meetha hota hai’ could not help my husband to bring it, who anyways was too lazy and ignorant about cravings to help me, an easily available ‘rasgulla’ was beyond his laziness at that time. There were also some sweets which he had never come across because of our regional differences, like the ‘makkhan ka samosa’ which is so ubiquitous in marriages around ‘Agra-Mathura’, but he had never heard of that. 

Third, the period after those nine months proved to be all the more grueling. At least when she was inside, apart from those physical inconveniences, I could sleep at will, eat when hungry and relax when desired. But all comforts or rather luxuries were gone the moment she came out. A whole day will pass, at the end of which I will realize that I have not even combed my hair. These kids have a knack at wetting or dirtying their clothes or feeling hungry at the most inappropriate times. Even after her fourth birthday, I miss my dear, old, long forgotten sweet uninterrupted sleep.

And last but not the least, the labour pains!! I distinctly remember, (much to the amusement of the attending nurse I am sure), with each cramp I was swearing aloud that this one baby is enough, I will not do another one!!!! And that too when I never reached the finality of the pains, she was delivered after cutting me apart.

But, even after knowing all of that, I am here again, more than willing to take the plunge once more!!! My experiences ought to have suitably warned me. But as usual I am surprised at my own mind and heart, anticipating to go through the whole process again.

I am keeping all my fingers and toes crossed and hope that this time will pass as uneventful as possible.

After one failed pregnancy, I know the pains of loosing a baby. It is OK if it is not given to you, but once you conceive, if that soul is snatched from you, the loss is unbearable. God please if you have chosen to make me pregnant again, please let me have it cute, intelligent and healthy, the requirements are all compulsory and must haves but still expressed in their reverse order of priority.

Bas, filhaal aur kuch nahin chahiye!!!





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